“Those who love themselves get offended too easily”
By William Richmond Basaiawmoit
Do we really need to be taught to love ourselves? Look at the current generation. Those who love themselves get offended easily. Any little thing they disagree with causes sulks, tantrums and cancel culture. We are too sensitive and we can’t live in the real world like that.
We actually need to learn to hate our pride, ego, our judging of others and the fact that we can easily destroy someone else’s life.
I have been in situations where, when something goes wrong, the first reaction is to say that ‘he/she is like this and therefore I reacted like this’, and so ‘please sympathise with me.’ But validating my position doesn’t do anything for me. It doesn’t allow me to grow.
The best kind of love is unconditional. But in this selfie generation, a person will like your photograph because they would like you to like their pictures. And if that doesn’t happen, they sink into depression.
My sister is a child psychologist who meets many parents worried that their three/four-year-olds are autistic because they are asocial. This when they spend 12 hours in front of a screen. It’s just that the children don’t know how to socialise. People who love themselves want things to be easy. Putting a screen in front of a child is easy. But then, where is the connection between parent and child?
William Richmond Basaiawmoit is the lead singer of The Shillong Chamber Choir.
“There’s a difference between self-care and selfishness”
By Nikhil Taneja
Self-love is a new concept to us. A lot of us still don’t understand what it is as we have grown up in a patriarchal society where the focus has never been on individual identity.
There’s a difference between self-care and selfishness. Self-love isn’t about yourself but also the community and spending time with people you love.
At this point of time, it is a radical thing that exists only on the internet as a fancy term. That’s because it’s difficult to grow out of our conditioning. So much of our understanding of ourselves comes from conditioning. And how do we love ourselves if we aren’t comfortable in our bodies? How do you talk about self-love in a corporate environment where every ounce of your efficiency is commodified? Being able to have a conversation about taking time off due to mental health is more important than the spa coupon your HR gives you for some ‘me-time’.
Self-love isn’t about commodities that will make us feel better for a brief while. It’s about making essential changes to life and choosing paths that are better for our mental health and peace of mind. It’s about making tough decisions which may seem painful but will be helpful for your mental health and peace of mind in the long run.
Nikhil Taneja is the co-founder and CEO of a youth media company, Yuvaa.
From HT Brunch, March 20, 2022
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